Dealing with Lumpy can be like dealing with a little kid at times. We’ve also discovered that Lumpy is quite the picky eater.
We’ve yet to recover from the mishap of Lumpy forgetting his microfusion powercells for his food replicator. We tried to MacGyver the thing to run on 120V and 240V, but no dice so far. We may need to escalate our efforts and get the Energizer Bunny or the Geek Squad on the case. Where’s Mr. Fusion when you need one?!
In the meantime, despite the early debacle of the Burrito Incident, we were hoping that Lumpy would be receptive to all types of food. While we’ve had some success with some kinds of food, we’ve found that for now, there’s one food that the Lumpster relishes- phở.
And now he asks all the time for the dang dish. As he can’t really speak English and that he is a semi-star (Lumpy needs a posse), at least one person on our production staff has to TOFTT-it* and dine with him at each meal.
This wouldn’t be bad if we had to deal with Lumpy’s meals if he only had three squares a day. But no such luck for us. You see, Zgrunturians tend to eat a lot. Which means Lumpy has to eat a lot. When mealtime comes, the staffer’s faces turn sullen with the look of fear and dread.
During our latest production meeting, instead of discussing the progress of our next update, an intern blurted out, “Yo, like this is totally pho’d up, man. Look, I can’t grab another meal with the dude. Don’t get me wrong, bro, I love him and all… but… But man, I’m all pho’d up.”
This was greeted by nodding heads followed by a murmuring chorus of, “Pho sure.” And then an uneasy silence.
An intern broke the uncomfortable silence and said, “Well, Super Nanny says you can maybe get a kid to eat something new if you have something similar to the food they like.” Everyone stared at him.
It’s not clear if the staffers’ reactions were that of horror or salvation.
Without another semi-reasonable option on the table, the comment was acknowledged by nods of approval, followed by everyone staring at the next victims...err…dining companions for Lumpy.
With a deer in the headlights look, they simply wanted to know where and what.
“It’s pretty hot today…why not Korean mul naeng myun? It’s got noodles, soup and it’s refreshingly cold,” someone suggested.
So Lumpy and the staffers took off for lunch to a Korean restaurant so that we could offer up a nice chilly bowl of the famous Korean noodle dish for our phở addicted star.
When the mul naeng myun appeared, Lumpy had a puzzled look on his face at first, but then said, “Pho mitai kamo.”**
Then as the slurping commenced, the Lumpster declared, “Oishii. Kore maji de oishii kamo.”***
And the Lumpster's verdict? It was "delish."
w00t! Smiles spread amongst the staffers’ faces and high fives started going around the table.
But the celebration was short lived as Lumpy said, “Demo, itsu pho tabeni ikuno?”****
The staffers’ smiles were wiped away as fast as you can say phở and replaced with the sullen faces once again.
Lumpy’s Agent could not be reached for comment.
* TOFTT: Take One For The Team
** 「フォー ミタイ カモ。」
***「オイシイ。コレ マジ デ オイシイ カモ。」
**** 「デモ、イツ フォー タベニ イクノ?」